In the category of experiments that don’t quite work, here is me trying to make something out of the article, “The adaptive significance of multiple mating in female mink (Mustela vison) and its effects on the mating system” by Melissa Anne Fleming. I came up dry on the usual goofy faking that has previously yielded poems I actually like, as in “Relaxation for Concentration, Stress Management, and Pain Control Using the Fleming Method,” so I went and looked up the abstract for the real article, thinking maybe I’d miraculously find a poem therein. I didn’t quite. But I noticed there were a lot of words with the letter ‘m’ in them. So I strung them all together:

Female multiple mating
common mammals limited
female multiple mating
American mink (Mustela)
female multiple mating
mating system. Multiple
mating female mink
matings. Matings implantation
matings promote sperm
competition. Determine female
mating males’ farm
females remate same
male (familiar) unfamiliar
males. Females mated
multiply male females
remated male familiarity,
females matings more.
Familiar males remating
females females mating
males male. Allozyme
confirmed males mating
male mating. Unfamiliar
mated more mated
familiar males male
sperm competition Mustela
mated May March
multiple mating farm
mink. Female mink
may multiply mate
maximum male-male competition